I will admit, one of my bigger fears with sailing with kids (aside from the increased daily risk of drowning) was what to do with my monkeys. I mean I love them madly but how does that work out without Kita????? (German daycare if you are not familiar with the term!)
The mama writer conflict: I want you near me at all times but if you are not quiet and I can not write I will go insane.
And this brings us into the ultimate conflict for a mama who needs to write.
My morning journaling has become if you can’t beat them then let them join in. But that is 10 minutes with The Desire Map Panner. That is not sitting down to write. How can I write when someone is constantly asking me to look at a drawing they did? For that matter how would I do any of the multitude projects I have planned for the Creative Mermaids? How could I just generally keep my sanity?
I learned the hard way the past 4 years that as much as I want to be the mom who is armed with snacks in one hand and age appropriate crafts in the other, I am not that person! (It is also why I stick my kids in so many courses. I don’t mind watching them do their projects. I just have no desire to do the planning for or cleaning up afterward.)
For me, I need writing time. The occasional Yoga class tossed in makes me a much happier mama. How is that working out on the boat?
In the end to comes down to: with daddy’s help.
The gatekeeper when I can not get off the boat to write:
I can not write with the kids in my direct vicinity. They want my attention. I want to write. Both deserve to be treated with respect. And both are in direct conflict with each other. And so that is where Patrick’s support comes in. I need him to be onboard with me taking 2 – 3 hours a day to write. Preferably in a cafe, but even if not then he occupies the kids on another part of the boat while I either hide in the back if the weather is crappy or outside if it is nice!
And this is working out lovely. We have come a long way from this video, when we had time constraints and we were doing more motoring and moving than slowing down. And although there are still moments when it hits me in the guts that I have only one brother now, the getting out to write is healing. Making the time to both write as well as only sail in good conditions is making me a calmer and happier sailor. As does standing firm on what mommy needs. And amazingly when I say I need this I get it. Saying “it would be nice” to have writing time results in no writing time. Saying “I need this” makes it happen!
Also, I am aware the still shot of this video is less than ideal. Thank you Vivienne McMaster and your amazing Body Peace program for helping me come to terms with the camera. Not an affiliate link, just a shot out to an amazing woman and program!
The other lovely part, although I always love my kids, I am so much happier around them once I have written.
And that is the part that makes sailing with small children ok! We are learning what we need and then we work together to make it happen. Then I have the energy to give my kids the attention they deserve, rather than feeling trapped in a small space with them non stop, I get to enjoy my time with them and be grateful I can. And look at these guys, they are so adorable! They deserve a happy mommy! And I deserve a life with writing and children in it.
Still setting it up, but it is coming more and more together!